Wednesday, September 01, 2004

Pretend Girlfriends.

I love the first day of a new month when I get to flip the calendar to see Brooke Burke in a new scantily-clad pose. And this month she isn’t even clad at all.

It’s sad when the closest thing you have to a girl in your life only comes in a two-dimensional format.

I remember once when I had a crush on a girl online. It got so bad that I would put her picture up on my monitor and gently kiss the screen. I’d come back an hour or so later to find lip marks all over the glass and wipe it away with a towel hoping my roommate didn’t notice it before me.

Nowadays, I just make due with my full-length body pillow. I call it “Ally” and go to bed each night with it cuddled up in my arms. I don’t go as far as making out with it, though. But I have on occasion woken up to find myself gently humping it.

Anyways, I think I’m going to head off to bed. Ally’s getting lonely.

And apparently so am I.