Friday, December 01, 2006

Old Fart.

Sorry for not updating this site. I’ve been too busy updating my house. Putting in insulation, painting walls, and installing floors can eat up alot of time previously spent writing crap to post online.

I turned 25 last week. It isn’t much different than 24, except for the crippling depression from realizing that at such a substantial age I have a no love life and still live with my parents.

My birthday was on a Monday, and as a special birthday gift, I received an extra-large workload. I had to celebrate my special day by working until 8:30pm. Spending your birthday evening alone at the office with only the cleaning lady emptying out your trashcan to befriend you is less fun than you’d think. 

I’ve been working that late pretty regularly for the past two weeks, so Thanksgiving break was much to be thankful for. Hung out with a bunch of friends and ate a bunch of food. I weighed myself before Thanksgiving and again when the weekend was over and it turned out I gained five pounds. That’s what I call a good Thanksgiving.

Finally got to see Stranger than Fiction. I liked it quite a bit. Bushie, who went with me, was less enthusiastic afterwards. That may not have been the movie’s fault.

As I said earlier, Thanksgiving is full of food. That results in me being full of food. And that results in me being full of gas.

I could feel the rumblings down below just before the movie started, but I thought I could contain it. Unfortunately, by a couple of scenes in, the mounting pressure had to be released. I tried to stagger the discharges into small increments to lessen any aromatic irritation, but I fear that may not have been enough.

If only the theater was more packed, then I could have blamed it on the fat guy next to me. Alas, the row was empty all the way down. If only we had seen the James Bond flick instead. That movie was probably packed with fat guys.

The weird thing is I couldn’t even tell if my passings had any odor. I think I may have grown too used to my gas to nasally detect it anymore. After the movie, Bushie never said anything about detecting any gas passes. Either she was being nice and didn’t mention it or I lucked out and my gas was the unscented variety. Let’s hope the latter is the case.

I’ve never been gassy like that before, but it’s been happening more and more on a regular basis. I guess that’s what happens when you get old.

Damn you, 25. Damn you.